Are You Obnoxious?

I once had an intriguing conversation with a man who considered himself an expert at networking. He ran a small local company for twenty years which, at its peak, created $2 million in revenues with only three employees. He did all of this without a single advertisement. He created revenues out of relationships. If you want to succeed in your sales career, bring in new business and reach and exceed your goals, the most powerful skill you can develop is one that allows you to create positive relationships with your prospects.

The importance of creating friendships in sales does not imply that you must be ingratiating, insincere or fawning. Certainly, these traits can be easily identified and would have the opposite effect of making your customers dislike you. If you want to be sure that you always leave your clients with a pleasant feeling about you it is necessary to be polite, gracious and kind. To create a relationship that allows your prospects to think of you as a friend, you must pay close attention to the impression you leave behind you.

Take the following example: in my younger days, I was always searching for the perfect business opportunity. I remember coming across the marketing material of a young entrepreneur who was trying to recruit people into his business. I read with great interest the testimonials of others who had done well under his direction. However, the page was a difficult read because the entrepreneur spoke in such abrupt and jarring ways.

“If you walk away from this opportunity, you will be asking for failure for the rest of your life,” he insisted. It was a bit harsh, but I understood his point, he was trying to get his readers to take action. “The reason you have not yet gained any significant wealth for yourself is because you haven’t earned it.” Again, this was a little obnoxious, but I could see why he was doing it so I kept reading. “If you’re not the type to follow through on this opportunity then you are not worth this course or my time.” That was where he lost me.

In trying to create a strong impact that would encourage action, this entrepreneur crossed the line. He went from someone I thought of as straight talking, to someone I thought of as abrupt, to someone I simply disliked. I left his material where it was and went to investigate one of the many other opportunities that were out there for me to consider. This is perhaps the most important factor for you to keep in mind when developing relationships. In a world filled with competition, people simply have too many options to bother with someone they do not like.

Action step: Assess your sales presentations, are you at all obnoxious? As much as you want to get the sale, you will experience more success by being more amicable. Adjust your pitch if necessary.

There were many ways this entrepreneur could have gotten his point across without seeming unpleasant and obnoxious. Instead of creating a feeling that he was better than others, he could have simply expressed an interest in sharing his knowledge with me. Many successful entrepreneurs have recruited people or sold educational materials by taking on the role of a mentor. Instead of chiding prospects and calling them lazy, these entrepreneurs talk about their success as something which you, the prospect, deserve. They create a feeling of privilege that you might learn at their side. It would have been far more likely to cause me to act rather than walk away.

In a world filled with competition, you cannot afford to make enemies of your prospects. While it is not necessary for you to become anything other than yourself, you should make the effort to present yourself as a person your prospects can like. Without this basic relationship, you will find your sales endeavors much more difficult.