Frequently private investigators will get asked this question . In my experience, it seems that the the cheater thinks that the Internet is a safe and anonymous method to meet people than the real world is. On line, you can be anything you want to be. Maybe better looking, more successful, happier. You can claim things on the internet that you would never say in the real world. In short, it gives people a place to live a fantasy life and indulge in extreme sexual fetishes they would not normally discuss. As the "relationship" goes on, the two get to know each other better and the real world begins to enter the conversations. Trust develops because this is the person "you relate to" and it builds up as more time goes by. It then gets to the point where they begin to be even more honest, sometimes totally honest, and an online affair becomes a real life relationship or affair outside of cyberspace.
Does it actually happen? Yes. Way too many of our clients consult with us and relate their disbelief that their loved one could be trolling for sex on the internet or having an on-line affair. The reality is that, like affairs at work ,school, church, the gym , it usually begins innocently and grows. People go online and get to know one another in this anonymous cyber world and slowly it progresses into cyber sex and or a real life meeting. Please don't underestimate this method for meeting others and developing relationships on the internet. Internet affairs happen daily, in every city across the country.
There are also those who are not looking for a relationship, rather they want unconventional sex with someone they don't know. In some cases, cyber sex fills this need. This sub-set is comprised of people who use online dating sites and social networking sites to meet other people who want no strings attached sex. They are attracted to the excitement of the affair. They like to type stories about extreme sexual fantasy and fetishes. hey look for others who share these desires or the same fetish. It is important not to stereo type these folks. They are not just strippers, escorts or the dirty old man wearing a rain coat. This is your neighbor, the soccer coach, the manager at the bank, your accountant and potentially your spouse. This group uses the computer the same way those looking for true love do. They visit certain fetish sites, e-mail, chat and instant message.
The best way to get evidence of On-Line Cheating oran On-Line Affair, or Cyber Sex As professional investigators we see it all the time. Clients whose spouse or loved one is cheating on them and carrying on the relationship on the internet. We STRONGLY recommend that you consider handling things yourself and try a dating service search. Enter your spouses email address and see which online dating sites they are using.
Copyright (c) 2008 Ed Opperman
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