What you name as the qualities of a great relationship? When asked, men have named things like their truck, their wrench set and their easy chair. They also name people like their old college buddy, their co-worker or their brother. They describe these relationships as being easy, simple, rewarding and low maintenance. Women also named objects, things like an appliance, a killer pair of shoes, a cozy sweater. Women discuss having ideal relationships with old friends, favorite neighbors and family. The words women might use to explain what makes these relationships ideal are words like dependable, comfortable, reliable. When I think about what I would consider an ideal relationship, I think about the bond I have with my dog. She's pretty easy maintenance. She only needs to be fed twice a day, maybe walked once, she needs a blanket to sleep on, and she needs my love. She will never withhold her love from me no matter what kind of day she's had. When I walk in the door at night I am the center of her universe, the person she's been waiting for all day, and she let's me know it. It's a pretty cool relationship. It's pretty remarkable the relationship between me and my dog. I know exactly what to expect, so she is reliable to a fault. I know exactly what I have to give, not much really. I know exactly what I'm going to get - everything she has. This is unconditional love. What is the definition of unconditional love? Unconditional love is the king of love you can give knowing your partner is not perfect. It's the kind of love that lingers after the passion has faded. Of course your partner has their faults, no one is perfect. You know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, and that's OK. You love them despite the faults and mistakes. This is what's called unconditional love. The same thing applies to you however in looking at your partner's faults. You must admit that you have faults as well. You know you are not even close to perfect and you've made your bid share of mistakes, too. You've got to admit these faults and accept them, and expect the unconditional love of your partner to overcome these challenges. Is there any lesson here? I Do we want to get a dog, because that's a dependable, comforting way to get love? We all clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the tendency to let our issues become bigger than they really are and rule our lives. That's only going to inhibit the giving and receiving of true love. Want to start working on your marriage or relationship and uncover the unconditional love that is simmering under the surface? The first thing you need to do is get rid of the emotional clutter that is clouding your feelings. Stop giving importance to faults and mistakes and turning them into issues. Focus on what really matters, your love for one another.
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